10 WordPressy Things You Can Buy with Gareth Bale Money

In one of the biggest sport stories of the week, Gareth Bale has left Tottenham Hotspur to join Real Madrid for a reported £85m. A Welshman is the most expensive footballer on this planet.

Already people have been looking at that money as a guide – so much so that the Vodafone sale of Verizon was quoted in “Bales” on Sky News, but just what can you get for that money? Ignoring the hospitals, schools & libraries that naysayers regularly bring up (who seemingly shout about footballer’s wages, yet are unusually quiet when comparing his wage to – say – that of a Hollywood A-Lister), and in stead let us look at what you – as an intrepid WordPress Developer, can buy for 1 Gareth Bale .

1. Gravity Forms

Lets be honest, if you’ve £85million, you’re in demand. And what better way to manage the demand than with a contact form on your website? Gravity Forms is the best form plugin for WordPress, and it’s one plugin that you really cannot live without once you’ve lived with it. It can do everything – literally everything – form based.

Assuming you’re using the developer licence, then you can buy a mere 665,257 developer licences . As Gravity Forms is currently (at the time of writing) on 731,241 sales, you would effectively double RocketGenius’ user base.

Click here to buy Gravity Forms

2. Genesis

Of course, probably the most famous WordPress theme suite out there is the Genesis Framework, with good reason. It’s remarkably well coded and – once you get your head around it – it is rather easy to throw together good-looking templates, leaving you to do what’s important to your site, whatever that may be.

If we’re buying the Pro Plus All-Theme package, you could buy 377,526 copies of the Pro Plus All Theme Package from Studiopress for the price of Gareth Bale . As there are 46 themes on the framework, then you’ll have around 8,200 sites looking the same.

Click here to buy Genesis Framework

3. Yoast SEO Bundle

Of course, once you’ve built your 377,526 Genesis websites, you will need them to be found! Yoast’s plugins are the leaders when it comes to SEO and getting your sites found on Google. Although the main plugin – WordPress SEO – is free, they have 3 extra plugins for optimising Local, WooCommerce and Videos, as well as training videos.

To buy the Yoast SEO Bundle, it is $599 at agency level. For Gareth Bale, you can get 220,561 copies of Yoast’s SEO Bundle. Not quite enough for your 377,526 sites, but getting there.

Click here to buy Yoast’s SEO Bundle

4. Twitter Feed Pro

So that’s SEO sorted, but what about social? Well social is mainly Twitter or Facebook, and for Twitter you need Twitter Feed Pro. Easy enough to install, compatible with Twitter API v1.1, and generally wonderful – no plugin I’ve used has been easy enough to use to integrate Twitter into your site.

It’s a steal at $19.99, so for Gareth Bale, you can buy 6,609,642 copies of Twitter Feed Pro . More than enough for your 377,526 sites. Social – sorted.

Click here to buy Twitter Feed Pro

5. Buffer

That’s tweets coming into your site sorted, but what about out of your site? Well one tool I love is Buffer. A lot of love for Buffer from me. If you’re unfamiliar with it then you simply schedule tweets to go out during the day.

Of course, it’s not strictly WordPress, but I do use it quite a lot. Going for the Agency level account of $250/month, you can subscribe to buffer for 44,039 years for the price of Gareth Bale . Considering that 40,000 years ago we were in the Upper Paleolithic Era, and a full 10,000 years before the Bow & Arrow was invented, then who knows if Buffer will still be going (sorry chaps, do love your work).

Click here to subscribe to Buffer

6. Automattic

Okay, lets talk less about products, what about companies? Well, let’s go with the big one – Automattic.

This is all ifs, buts and maybes, but Automattic – speculated in a Business Insider article – appears to be valued around the $1 billion mark. As such, Bale’s £85 million transfer value roughly equates to a 13% stake in Automattic. Assuming Matt wants to sell that, of course. And assuming I know about corporate valuations (which I don’t).

7. WordPress Training

I have assumed that so far you know everything about WordPress. Fact is, you probably don’t. You probably need some training.

MadLab in Manchester run three WordPress courses from Mike Little, who is the co-founder of WordPress, and are well recommended as Mike really knows his stuff. For Gareth Bale’s money, you can train 141,666 people to an advanced WordPress Standard in MadLab , which is the population of St. Vincent & The Grenadines, along with the population of Liechtenstein as well. Mike is going to be busy!

Click here for WordPress Training in Madlab (Beginner) Course

Click here for WordPress Training in Madlab (Intermediate) Course

Click here for WordPress Training in Madlab (Advanced) Course

8. bbPress Complete

Of course, that’s WordPress, what about diversifying? Well suppose you know a fair bit and want to learn about another Automattic piece of software, say bbPress?

Recently, I launched bbPress Complete, probably the world’s first book dedicated to bbPress. For Gareth Bale, you can get 3,865,393 copies of my book – which is roughly enough for two-thirds of the population of both mine and Gareth’s native Wales. Do it Gareth, you know it makes sense!

Click Here to Buy bbPress Complete

9. WP Email Capture

I don’t just write books, oh no. I also write plugins. WP Email Capture is my most successful one, having a few downloads and helping users capture email addresses quickly and painlessly.

However, for Gareth Bale, you could buy 2,695,845 copies of WP Email Capture, making it more successful. More than enough for all your sites!

Click here to buy WP Email Capture

10. One Extremely Generous Donation To Inline Tweet Sharer

Yes for Gareth Bale’s £85m fee, you can give me one extremely generous donation for Inline Tweet Sharer , which you can read more about here or download for free here.

What? A guy can dream, right? 😉